Serving on active duty or being married to someone who serves often means that change is the norm. New duty stations, new units, new friends, new homes, new schools and new dentists every two to four years.
With every move, there is a home and a support system that you left behind after the packers loaded up all your household goods (and maybe even the trash). While we all learn to “suck it up and drive on”, PCSing can be hard. There is grief and loss involved in every PCS move. You deserve to have support in these transitions.
The deployment cycles of the past several decades bring their own set of grief points. The pain of the transition of leaving your family to finally do the job you’ve been training for, or sending your spouse to a combat zone is something we often just swallow and shove down. Repeated deployments often don’t make it easier, it’s just a pain we know. Unit casualties are often something that we just don’t talk about. If you haven’t walked that path, it’s hard to know what the deployment and redeployment grind feels like.
ETS/Retirement is a whole different level of grief. While there will most likely be some relief to finally have control over where you live and if you move, transitioning to civilian life is emotionally challenging for service members and their families. The organizing force that pushed your life forward for the past four to twenty-plus-years is gone. Many can feel lost, untethered and lonely without a mission, mandatory fun and unit affiliated friendships. You may feel there is an empty space in your life due to no longer being part of something larger than yourself. Many find this to be painful or disorienting. It’s normal, and therapy can help you navigate this transition in the healthiest way possible.
As the spouse of a retired Army veteran I have PCS’d countless times, supported my service member through multiple OIF/OEF deployments and navigated the transition to civilian life with my family. I would be honored to assist you in your journey, where ever it leads you.